Author Topic: im dying (Read 4439 times)

andi_mom · « **Reply #20 on:** August 09, 2011, 09:24:30 am »

look at the bright side, at least you're not pregnant when you discovered he's married. so you'll be okay. you don't even have to think about it but just get away from him. things will be more complicated and painful if you don't go now.

sweet.trish · « **Reply #21 on:** August 14, 2011, 04:18:25 am »

^sis imposible pa naman ako mabuntis kasi wala pa naman nangyayari sa min. i dont know why, hindi rin naman sya nag effort.

im sure maiinis kayo sakin, kasi till now hindi ko pa rin sya totally nile-let go. we still talk. pero wala syang binibigay na promises or assurance. he just keeps on saying he's sorry for what he did. ako naman si engerts eh mukhang naniniwala.

aquacharly · « **Reply #22 on:** August 14, 2011, 09:16:34 am »

Sige, do what you wanna do -- matigas ulo mo eh. pero eto ha, hwag mo sya sisihin 1 day should he move on to another -- no promises nga sya plus full disclosure. Lalong hwag mo sisi wife ha.

If I were gonna sell you a stove and tell you, o ayan, used na yan, I cannot promise hindi sasabog sa face mo ha -- tapos sumabog nga sa face mo 1 day.... Hwag mo ko sisihin, no hard feelings ha, hwag mo ko demanda, and do not expect me to even visit you sa hospital ha. no warranties, full disclosure -- buyer beware. In the meantime, thank you ha sa binayad mo.

People who play with fire usually end up barbequed. But you just may be the exemption to the trend: you barbeque him.

Your call, your choice, your consequence. Take care of yourself.

thestargazer · « **Reply #23 on:** August 14, 2011, 11:22:47 pm »

Sis, payo ko lang MOVE on. Alam ko it hurts kase mahal mo sya but you have to let him go. Finding out that he is married is enough reason to let go. Be thankful that you found out. Hindi ka nya kailangang lokohin ng matagal. Mas masakit yun. Pray and be thankful hindi ka malulugmok sa kasalanan at pagkakamali.

sweet.trish · « **Reply #24 on:** August 18, 2011, 06:28:13 am »

hi sisters.

napaka masokista ko gusto ko talaga atang masaktan ng todo! mas maganda pa nga siguro na sumabog na lang sa mukha ko yung oven para matapos na... to think na hindi rin naman nya ko pinipilit mag stay with him. eto lang ang sabi nya sakin, "mahal kita, whatever happens. kahit we part ways" and kung kelan pa nagkaganito eh saka ko pa mas na-feel na talagang mahal nya ko. hindi ko rin naman pinipilit yung sarili ko sa kanya. i dont even text or call him. makita ko lang sya sa office masaya na ko. pero somehow im still hoping... haaay... ewan ko.

andi_mom · « **Reply #25 on:** August 18, 2011, 06:49:19 am »

sis the thought na he stays with his wife means mahal niya yung wife niya. and the thought na hindi ka niya pinapaasa, means baka ayaw niya lang din saktan ka pero he doesn't want to continue na. let go na sis, you'll be better off without him.

wengertzz · « **Reply #26 on:** August 18, 2011, 06:50:22 am »

^ sis, try to detach yourself habang maaga pa.. don't be so blinded with your feelings.. this happened to me ang hirap umalis sa sitwasyon.. ilang beses ko ng kinumbinse sarili ko to stop and let go and move on at magpakalayo para lang akong nakabaon sa quick sand.it's tough. every night and day I pray na matapos na to.. hindi birong pain and hindi ko to pinangarap sa sarili ko at sa future baby ko. I want a fresh start.. I wanna have my own life back without his shadows lurking around..

spare yourself from heartache.. mas masakit sis if you still go on and hope to see a silver lining coz there's none...

sweet.trish · « **Reply #27 on:** August 18, 2011, 03:38:40 pm »

sis wengertzz, kaw na din nagsabi na mahirap di ba?
hindi ako umaasang iiwan nya yung wife nya for me, pero i know na mahal nya rin ako. ewan ko. ayoko na mag isip. im still trying to act normal pero everytime maaalala ko sya bigla na lang ako malulungkot, yung parang gusto ko maiyak na lang kahit nasa mall ako. ayoko lang pilitin yung sarili ko na bigla syang kalimutan as if never sya nag exists.

mommycute46 · « **Reply #28 on:** August 22, 2011, 01:13:49 pm »

^Unless you have the urge to try, mananatili kang ganyan, start accepting na rin siguro ang term na "kabit". Masakit pero yon ang stand mo sa lalaking sinasabi mong mahal mo. Ang dali magsabi sumabog sana ang oven sa mukha mo but once it happens, you'll realize it's not just your face that was damaged, it's more on the inside. Mahirap sa mahirap pero sa umpisa lang yan, I've been in that situation too and I even extend the agony by trying to win him back but I just realize one day, I'm better without him, and the funny thing is, nagkabaliktad ang sitwasyon after just a year. Siya ang humahabol sa akin but I just laugh and said it's over.

So there, It's all in the mind. Itigil mo na yan bago pa isampal sa mukha mong kabit ka. You do not deserve to be called that way.

Superjoie · « **Reply #29 on:** August 22, 2011, 01:20:37 pm »

Quote from: mommycute46 on August 22, 2011, 01:13:49 pm

^So there, It's all in the mind. Itigil mo na yan bago pa isampal sa mukha mong kabit ka. You do not deserve to be called that way.

She's right sis.

pinkberries · « **Reply #30 on:** August 22, 2011, 02:33:13 pm »

sis TS, wala pang nangyayari sa inyo pero you can't live without him na agad? ano yon? emotional affair?

Aichusyu · « **Reply #31 on:** August 23, 2011, 11:03:04 am »

Quote from: sweet.trish on August 18, 2011, 06:28:13 am

hi sisters.

napaka masokista ko gusto ko talaga atang masaktan ng todo! mas maganda pa nga siguro na sumabog na lang sa mukha ko yung oven para matapos na... to think na hindi rin naman nya ko pinipilit mag stay with him. eto lang ang sabi nya sakin, "mahal kita, whatever happens. kahit we part ways" and kung kelan pa nagkaganito eh saka ko pa mas na-feel na talagang mahal nya ko. hindi ko rin naman pinipilit yung sarili ko sa kanya. i dont even text or call him. makita ko lang sya sa office masaya na ko. pero somehow im still hoping... haaay... ewan ko.

Really? Hoping for what? FOR YOU TO BECOME THE KABIT? FOR YOU TO BECOME THE MANGWAWASAK PAMILYA? TO BE THE REASON WHY HIS KID WILL ASK "WHY IS MY DADDY NOT HERE WITH ME?" AND YOU'RE HOPING FOR THAT?

Harsh reality is harsh. But you have to face the music. You have to be woman enough to know what you will become once you choose to ask him to stay with you.

For whatever intents and purpose you are "hoping". It can only be that you want to continue with the relationship with the married-with-a-kid guy, right? That's why you are staying. That's why you continue to like getting sms messages from him. That's why you want to talk with him a lot more. What's your purpose in that? For you to be happy temporarily? What of your future with this guy?

Think about it if YOU are the wife of this guy you love so much. Because you are so far away, you don't know that he has this girl he is seeing all the time. Nothing is happening between them physically, but the initmacy that you and your husband should only share is now being given exlusively to this girl. Do you like that? Do you think that's fair to you? It's all kindergarten lessons really: "Don't do onto others what you don't want others to do unto you."

All that I am saying here I offer for you to think hard about.

realshaddy · « **Reply #32 on:** August 23, 2011, 11:53:47 am »

i was once in that very same situation a few years back and it really hurts like hell. but what i did, i pray, i prayed night and day crying my hearts out. it helped -- it really helped me a lot.

and i'm glad i made the right decision to let go at once, because i'm happy now with my hubby. looking back, it took me about a year to get over my ex. then i met hubby 1.5 years after that. it's about perfect timing.

i know it's hard, i was once there, but i did it sis. i know you can too. i didn't resort to going out or hanging out with my friends when that happened, what i did is i prayed, i chose to be alone and reflect on myself. you can do it sis. theres so much to life than to be in that situation.

sweet.trish · « **Reply #33 on:** August 23, 2011, 01:41:10 pm »

totoo sis pinkberries, wala pang nangyayari sa min. weird ba? ewan ko nga ba bakit hindi kami umabot sa ganun. pero ansakit pa din. siguro kasi umaasa ako na sya na tapos lokohan lang pala!

its too painful, parang mas eto na yung pinakamasakit sa lahat ng heartaches ko. mas pa when me and my kid's dad parted ways!

we dont text/call each other anymore,. he just sends me email. maski sa office hi and hello lang. ok naman, nasanay na ko, and ayoko na rin ng intimacy. ayokong may ma-miss, ayokong gumawa ng mas maraming memories na hahanap-hanapin ko lang. ayoko na may maalala. sana nga bigla na lang ako magkaron ng amnesia. ayoko maka feel ng sama ng loob, galit, or anything else. ayokong magkaron ng kahit anong emotion sa kanya. pwede na yun, yung kunwari hindi sya naging part ng buhay ko. sana ganun na lang!

babyjapnurse01 · « **Reply #34 on:** August 23, 2011, 01:54:40 pm »

Napa-buntong hininga nalang ako when I read the story.

Sige lang go ahead lang and keep talking to the guy, tutal okay lang naman sayo the fact that he's married eh, since sobrang attached ka na sa kanya, go lang ng go, tutal wala narin naman makakapigil sayo but yourself, upon reading all the advice that everyone shared here, mukhang di ka pa din natatauhan eh. Basta make sure lang na hindi mo sisisihin si guy oras na makahanap yan ng ibang girl na pwede nya rin paglaruan tapos idump ka nya bigla.

At the end of the day, ikaw din naman ang responsible dyan sa heartache na yan eh, may baby ka na pala and yet you still dont know the value of having a family, kung mas importante sayo yung feelings mo for him rather than trying to push yourself up and move on after knowing his dirty little secret, well ikaw na ang masarap batukan dyan and not the guy. Seriously.

and no, please stop believing that he loves you, hindi ka nya mahal, you are the meantime girl, nothing more, nothing less. kasi kung mahal ka nyan, baka iniwan na nya family nya for you.

the mere fact na tinago nga nya sayo means he's ready na for the fact na you will find out sooner or later about his secret, and the mere fact na he stayed with you padin even with that thought means that he doesnt care even if you get hurt once you find out. ganun lang kasimple yun.

and wag ka na magtaka kung bakit wala pang nangyayari sayo, it can only mean one thing -- satisfied sya in bed with his wife kaya he doesnt need another girl for booty call lang.

naisip ko lang, you are not here to ask for advice eh para matauhan ka, you are just here to share kung ano yang mga sama ng loob mo, taga-cuento kumbaga, while all of us here are concerned for your welfare, ikaw naman mega ignore sa lahat ng mga payo sayo, so sa mga susunod na magpopost, utang na loob, wala nang magssugarcoat ng mga comments/advice, halatang halata naman na wala rin talaga tayong magagawa kasi gustong gusto talaga ni TS si guy. hehe!

baliwsayo · « **Reply #35 on:** August 23, 2011, 02:28:23 pm »

^Hindi kaya dahil sa bitin siya dun sa guy kasi hindi pa sila nag-sex?

So many sensible advises na.. so, dun naman ako sa hindi sensible.. ayain mo kaya mag-sex kayo then malay mo hindi pala siya masarap eh di madali ka na makaka-move on.

Okey seriously, I suggest you apply for a new job in another company para totally maalis mo na siya sa system mo. Change your number and block him sa email mo.

Surely, this too shall pass. Ganun lang naman talaga. Lahat ng sugat, naghihilom din. Though may maiiwan na peklat to remind us to be more careful next time para di na maulit yun ganung sakit.

cindylulu · « **Reply #36 on:** August 23, 2011, 04:09:21 pm »

nagpapauto naman kasi etong si sis natin e. konting "i love you" lang and "i'm sorry", hulog sya uli. e kung hurt ka talaga and ayaw mo na, e di mag resign ka to avoid the guy. hanap ka ng ibang work. por delicadeza.

may baby ka na pala. single mom ka. and how many times were you emotionally hurt by a guy?(from your baby's father to this guy and dunno how many in-between or prior). natuto ka na dapat di ba? don't you think there's really something wrong with you? bakit hindi ka sineseryoso ng mga lalaki?

ako sa yo sis, future ng baby mo ang aasikasuhin mo. mas importante ang bata kesa sa BS na lalaki na yan. or baka mas gusto mo pa may kasunod na baby no. 2? na ang apelyido kuha pa rin sa yo? masaya yun. iba-ibang tatay and ikaw lahat nagpapalaki, sustento man o wala.

come on, you're not that naive naman di ba? not ignorant din naman of the ways of the world. may baby ka na nga e. sana you'll listen and ponder the advices of your sisses here in gt. well-meaning lahat to sis. we don't want you to get hurt ok?

pinkberries · « **Reply #37 on:** August 23, 2011, 04:27:04 pm »

Quote from: sweet.trish on August 23, 2011, 01:41:10 pm

totoo sis pinkberries, wala pang nangyayari sa min. weird ba? ewan ko nga ba bakit hindi kami umabot sa ganun. pero ansakit pa din. siguro kasi umaasa ako na sya na tapos lokohan lang pala!

its too painful, parang mas eto na yung pinakamasakit sa lahat ng heartaches ko. mas pa when me and my kid's dad parted ways!

we dont text/call each other anymore,. he just sends me email. maski sa office hi and hello lang. ok naman, nasanay na ko, and ayoko na rin ng intimacy. ayokong may ma-miss, ayokong gumawa ng mas maraming memories na hahanap-hanapin ko lang. ayoko na may maalala. sana nga bigla na lang ako magkaron ng amnesia. ayoko maka feel ng sama ng loob, galit, or anything else. ayokong magkaron ng kahit anong emotion sa kanya. pwede na yun, yung kunwari hindi sya naging part ng buhay ko. sana ganun na lang!

Masakit talaga yan sis, because you believed him and trusted him umpisa pa lang. Ganon talaga. But now you know the truth, you need to slowly let go of all kinds of communication you have with him. Sa umpisa lang yan mahirap and soon you'll get over him.

When the day comes that you miss this guy, remind yourself of these things:

1. He LIED. And that He IS married.
2. You have a kid so think about your kid's future. THAT truth should bring you back to your senses.
3. NEVER waste your time again with a MARRIED man. THAT will save you from unending heartaches.

Take care, TS. Pray and pray harder. Lilipas din yan.

sweet.trish · « **Reply #38 on:** August 24, 2011, 06:18:49 am »

salamat sa concern nyong lahat. kung iba yung nasa posisyon ko ngayon for sure ganyan din yung sasabihin ko. i know naman what's the right thing to do. sino bang gustong maging kabit? im just being honest kung anong napi-feel ko ngayon. tutal wala naman nakakakilala sakin dito. mahal ko pa rin sya and sana nga may magic na bigla na lang yun mawala. and he is still trying to communicate with me. at ako naman natutuwa/nasasaktan. thank you sa mga nag effort na mag comment and mag advise.

kino-consider ko nga rin talaga magresign. pero since may baby ako i need to make sure muna may lilipat akong magandang company. over na rin ako sa "mukmok/drama" phase. pero pag naiisip ko sya, wow, sakit pa din.

ang hirap magpretend na strong eh. accepted ko nang hind talaga kami. pero yung "im so over him" thing eh hindi ko pa talaga masabi sa sarili ko.

babyjapnurse01 · « **Reply #39 on:** August 24, 2011, 01:08:03 pm »

even ako, parang last resort na yung pagreresign eh, kasi may baby ka, kung single ka, sige lang resign lang para umiwas, pero may binubuhay kang bata eh so that goes on the bottom of the list ng options.

but then, sa takbo ng sitwasyon, dapat natatauhan ka na eh, kalimutan mo nalang muna yung feelings mo for him, it will just cause more trouble eh.

alam mo sis, ill be honest with this, pero kung di ka talaga matatauhan, parang ang sarap nalang i-wish na malaman nung wife yung tungkol sa inyo para kahit papano maputol na talaga yung something between you and her husband. call me salbahe pero yun nalang talaga naiisip kong way para matigil ka, ang tigas din kasi talaga ng ulo mo eh, konting himas lang okay ka na, konting pansin lang sayo feel na feel mo na kaagad na mahal ka, when in fact hindi ka naman mahal nung tao eh, coz if he does, (ulitin ko lang) baka hiniwalayan nya na yung asawa nya for you, kaso hindi ganun eh.

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Author Topic: im dying (Read 4439 times)