How do you cope when everyone is getting pregnant but you?

[Madelskie]

Madelskie, very well said!! 

For my case, nakakadepressed lang pag AF comes, then prayers lang talaga that will help us to move on.  Then after a day or two, back to being positive again. I will discover new insights, ideas and inspiration thru websites as well as here at GT.   In short, new hope again for the next cycle.

Ganun lang talaga siguro, go lang ng go! and just patiently wait for our right time to have a baby of our own.  After all, only God knows what's best for us.  My mantra for everyday:  Everything happens for a reason 

Thanks sis! Hindi madali ang lahat, it's a process, pero depende sa'tin kung pano natin iaaccept

Positive lang tayo sis para maattract din ang 2 pink lines

[MPT072311]

to all ttc sisters,

keep the faith! There is a plan for all of us. Try to think, God as our father know best.
As draining as negative PT's or AF is when she comes, chipper up and carry on. Just think that this is a learning experience and that we will be much better people and parents for it.
As depressed as I may get sometimes, I wouldn't trade this journey for the world. It has brought me closer to my husband, my mother and mother in law and made me a more patient and faithful soul. Talagang maappreciate mo na a baby is truly a gift from God.
Offer your suffering up, and God will take the wheel. And remember that He is close to the crushed in spirit. He is the silent shoulder we all may lean on when the going starts to get tough.

-M

[Rheintzie]

I can relate to all this. I was TTC for 3 years. I had 2 miscarriages then. I was asked all sorts of questions why I wasn't yet, mostly from my in-laws; some nicely put, others laced with taunt. Sometimes I retorted; other times just smiled nicely and walk away. At times I avoided family gatherings on hubby's side, making a lousy excuse of being busy with work. Through all these, I am just so glad that my family and my hubby was so supportive.

And through all these, I kept the faith high and the hopes up that in God's perfect time, when the Lord sees it fit to grant me my heart's desire, it shall happen.

And it has happened. I am now on my 6th month of pregnancy. The Lord is good.

So my dear TTCers, take everything always to God in prayer. God bless everyone.

[ayee10_cha]

At first hindi ko pa talaga pinapansin lalo ng nung first 3 mos namin ni hubby 9 mos pa lang kaming kasal ang dami dami ng nagtatanong kung hindi pa ba kami mag baby. Sinasabi ko na lang kung bibigay ni God ibibigay. Tsaka minsan sinasabi ko din kailangan ko pang magipon ayoko naman na pag nanjan na yung baby eh kung saan saan namin pupulutin pera namin pang bili ng gamit ni baby. Ngayon hindi ko na pinapansin pag sinasabi nila "ano wala pa bang laman?" sinasabi ko na lang wala pa eh busog lang lang ako. Dinadaan ko na lang sa joke or minsan ngumingiti na lang ako. Ewan ko ba bakit ngayon pag nagpakasal ka feeling nila isang talon lang buntis ka na hindi muna nila iniisip kung may sakit ka pa like PCOS parang ako. Gusto nila buntis ka kagad eh ako naman gusto ko mag enjoy muna kami ni hubby na kami lang kahit 1 yr muna.

Kung ibibigay ni God ang gift ibibigay niya. Hintay hintay lang tayo... 

[MPT072311]

ayee10_cha - i totally feel ya! 10.5 months married palang kami ni hubby and ang daming tanong. I have to keep explaining na PCOS ako (and before my hysteroscopy may polyps pa.) and what that means.
Minsan may mga snide comments about why we are not preggy during family gatherings from my own uncles, nakakawalan ng gana to go. Especially since after the operation, aggressive na ang TTC, IUI and work-ups.
i feel like maybe the people who think it's so easy to get pregnant for everyone, they havent had the experience of themselves, or someone they truly care for to go through some period of infertility. kaya tactless?
now i just figured, detach from those that hurt us. I wish them no ill, i just wish them wisdom to see how they are hurting us. And wish they would learn to be tactful. deadma lang. and pray with everything i've got.

[m_lim]

huwag kayong magpa pressure sa mga nagtatanong!

ang magandang tanong sila na may mga anak kayang kaya ba nila buhayin or ginagapang lang?

maraming ganyan. kung makapag tanong ng buntis ka na? kailan ba? bakit wala pa?

pero tingnan mo ang buhay hirap na hirap buhayin mga anak nila

[aphrile0927]

Sobrang nakakarelate ako sa post na to. 6 years na kami ni hubby and yet ttc pa rin. First 3 years was so difficult for me dahil lahat ng nasa paligid namin ni hubby nagkaka baby na like his younger brother na 2 na ang anak at ang aking younger brother na may 1 anak. Nakakapagod sumagot sa mga tanong na "May anak ka na?" "Kelan niyo pa balak eh nasa age na kayo?" Im 28 and hubby's 32, Tanong dito tanong doon, dumating sa punto na 1 month akong na depressed dahil sa sitwasyon i always cry at night bakit ganun pero eventually nalagpasan ko din lahat. Parang na - immune na rin ako at dagdag pa ang suporta sakin ng husband ko sabi niya "Kesehodang magkaanak tayo o hindi ok lang ang importante magkasama tayo pagtanda natin, kung mag kaanak man tayo Bonus na ni God yun." Mula noon natauhan ako bakit ko nga ba idodown lalo ang sarili ko. Itinuon ko ang atensiyon ko sa aking pamilya, mga kaibigan na may parehas kong sitwasyon at sa pagta-travel. Yun na lang pakonswelo namin ni hubby na mas nagiging matatag pagsasama namin habang tumatagal naeenjoy namin ang isat isa para pag dumating na ang angel namin handang handa na kami. Ngayon tanggap ko na kung ano man ang maging resulta, magkaanak man kami or hindi ok lang kung ipagkakaloob ni God salamat ng marami, pero di pa din ako nawawalan ng pag-asa. Kung dumating man kami parehas sa edad na malapit ng mag 40 siguro mag aampon na lang kami which is another story and i know mas alam ni God kung ano ang nararapat sa amin. Napakamakapangyarihan ng prayers, inaalis nito ang anumang doubts, worries at negative elements. Kaya pakatatag lang tayo at have FAITH always.

Sending some baby dust to all of us!

[dca201]

I got a dog. 

Nice :-)

[newbeymum]

Its really hard not everyone can understand plus yun iba marunong pa sa doctor magbibigay ng sariling diagnoses nila kakaloka. I had one miscarriage due to blighted ovum, 6 failed iui doctor diagnoses unexplained infertility. bawat month na dumadating si af nakaka depress. what i do nagbabakasyon kame ni hubby kaya dami rin kame napuntahan para lang kame mag bf/gf lang parati kame date galore sa boracay parati kame palipas panahon kaya abangers ako ng seat sale ng eroplano and we have a dog pet shi tzu na parang baby rin sya hehe.. Prayer talaga ang nagpapalakas ng loob ko and my faith na someday i can achieve also my biggest dream na mabuntis and mag silang ng malusog na baby..

[marygabriellee]

want to share mga sis. was really depress now and been crying all night yesterday. my sister who got married last December, is 1 month pregnant! while, we've been married for almost 4years and TTC for a year. she is working abroad with a 2 year contract and doesn't want to get pregnant pa until her contract is finished. pero, there buntis na sya ng walang kahirap hirap! yes, i am happy for them but deep inside I'm really sorry for myself. Pretty sure that I'll be hearing  the "naunahan pa nila kayo" from all our relatives. 

I know that with God's grace, I can cope up with all these. Just want to stay in bed today and senti mode muna. 

[abel823]

mga sis...wag na kayong malungkot...
ako nga 11 years agwat sa akin ng younger sister ko.
I got married 2002.
my younger sis got married last 2010.
she got pregnant and deliver a healthy boy sept 2011...
I had ivf this april.. then miscarried.
My younger sister of 11 years is pregnant again... will deliver this november 2012 ( dragon baby).
Kung nag ka heartbeat lang yun baby ko Jan 1, 2013 sana ako manganganak... so sad.. but what can we do... Meron talagang maswerte at pinag pala. Unlike sa case natin kelangan natin pag hirapan para makuha yun inaasam asam natin.

[Beng01]

Dont worry mga sis, mapepreggy din kayo lahat. Prayers and patience ang sandata. 

[GabbyAya]

What Makes a Mother

I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today.
I asked, “what makes a mother?”
and I know I heard him say,

“A mother has a baby.”
This we know is true.
“But God, can you be a mother
when your baby's not with you?”

“Yes, you can,” He replied
with confidence in His voice.
“I give many women babies.
When they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime
and others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb
but there's no need to stay.”

“I just don't understand this, God
I want my baby here.”
He took a breath and cleared His throat
and then I saw a tear.

“I wish I could show you
what your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile
with other children and say,”

"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of life and love and fear.
My Mommy loved me, Oh so much,
I got to come straight here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom
who had so much love for me,
I learned my lesson very quickly.
My Mommy set me free.

I miss my Mommy, Oh so much,
but I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
on her pillow's where I lay.

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
and whisper in her ear,
'Mommy don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I'm here.”

So you see, my dear sweet one,
your children are okay.
Your babies are here in MY home
and this is where they'll stay.

They'll wait for you with ME
until your lesson is through.
And on the day that you come home,
they'll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother—
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of,
right from the very start.

Though some on earth may not realize you are a Mother,
until their time is done.
They'll be up here with ME one day,
and know you're the best one.
~Jennifer Wasik~


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-p3e8_XKoRo&feature=related

[m_lim]

kahapon napanuod ko sa Oprah yung isang mag asawa, 3years ttc then nung nabuntis, nakunan naman kahit nilabas ng buhay yung baby.

they tried one more time and guess what? they had sextuplets! yes, 6 babies agad.

God is really amazing!

[marygabriellee]

i don't have friends who have the same experience kaya they don't understand what I'm going through. really happy to have discovered GT. I dont feel alone. di lang maiwasan minsan to be depressed especially pag may kakilala na nauna pang nagkababy.

thanks mga sis! I'm holding on to my faith and I know Father God will bless us with our little angel in His perfect time.

[paradise11]

Sa sampung taon na TTC kaming mag-asawa lahat ng parinig, ridicule, sakit sa loob at Kung ano ano pa siguro naranasan ko na. I'd admit nung simula iyak ako ng iyak. Anduong kausapin ko ang Diyos at tanungin. But in time natutunan ko na ding laruin kaya nakakayanan ko ng sabayan. But it doesn't mean that I don't get hurt. I do. I still do. But now I know how to easily recover from those blows. In time nahahasa pala ang abilidad mong makisakay. Sabi nga experience makes us wiser and better persons. So I think in this TTC journey different ways of coping up develop through time kaya the next time taunting from friends or family happens effortlessly we can bounce back. Kaya sis let's just be steadfast in this journey. Keep the faith and positive attittude. Next time it'll be our turn to host Christening and birthday parties. *wink* Baby dust to us all!

[angelshines]

ever since we found out that i have this condition of endo cyst, i understood how it'll be hard for me to get pregnant. no pressure even with my in laws since alam naman nila. not until this past weekend, that we found out that my brother in law's gf is pregnant. i felt sad on how happy my mother in law reacted. wished that reaction was for me, kasi my husband is the panganay. oh well. there's no other way but to accept, move on and stick to the goal. I believe God has better plans. That happiness lang sana, if the first apo is from us

[pinkstar712000]

Hello to all! For almost 13 years I've been fighting the same bitterness. I got married in 1999, got pregnant three times kaya lang blighted lahat. Almost everyone close to me-friends, relatives, siblings, even neighbors who got married after me are now parents. Ako, ttc pa rin.

Buti na lang God gave me a very understanding hubby. He keeps telling me na masaya naman kami kahit kaming dalawa lang. If I want daw, we can adopt. Lately, we stopped worrying and just leave everything to God. We became devotees of St. Padre Pio (there's a thread about him here where I shared how he helped us). Now,at 41, im 6weeks pregnant and my baby already has a heartbeat!
Wag lang tayong bibitaw sa faith natin, all is possible...

[raylet]

Hello to all! For almost 13 years I've been fighting the same bitterness. I got married in 1999, got pregnant three times kaya lang blighted lahat. Almost everyone close to me-friends, relatives, siblings, even neighbors who got married after me are now parents. Ako, ttc pa rin.

Buti na lang God gave me a very understanding hubby. He keeps telling me na masaya naman kami kahit kaming dalawa lang. If I want daw, we can adopt. Lately, we stopped worrying and just leave everything to God. We became devotees of St. Padre Pio (there's a thread about him here where I shared how he helped us). Now,at 41, im 6weeks pregnant and my baby already has a heartbeat!
Wag lang tayong bibitaw sa faith natin, all is possible...

Very inspiring post, sis pinkstar71200. Sana kami din sumunod na

[dhadha18]

haaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!! same sentiments.... sobrang nakakalungkot and cant deny na may konting inggit...

how to cope? pray... pray... beliv na nothing is impossible kay God...
and of course GT... kc dito mo makakausap yong mga tao na same situation ng sayo.. yong ibang tao kc na hindi nakaka experience ng ganito satin, never talaga nila tayo maiintindihan... and minsan nga, they feel pity pa.. haist...