My bf's MOM

[mocha1209]

^ oo nga sis feeling ko din she sees me as a threat. Kasi kapag nag move out kami syempre pprioritize ni bf yung bills namin. Im taking my masterals na. Pero ang nakikita ko lang super selfish ng mama niya. And your also right na siguro super love ko lang si bf kaya di ko siya maiwan. anyway nagiipon lang ako ng enough money to move out. Di ko pa nadidiscuss sa kanya pero im pretty sure na sasama loob niya. Pero don't you think na if nag move out ako does it mean na sumuko na ko? Eh di lalo natuwa ang bruha kong soon to be MIL.  Haist sa totoo lang nasusuya na ko na makita siya..

[chicafabulosa]

It doesnt mean sumusuko ka na. May respeto ka pang natitira kahit kaunti sa mother nya kaya ka aalis no. Magkaiba yun sa sumusuko

[mocha1209]

^lol para kasi pag umalis ako may nakikita kong witch na humahalakhak and saying "i won".hehe

[chicafabulosa]

Well ganun talaga. Hayaan mo sya. Mas better quiet ka lang. At least di ikaw ang lalabas na walang modo di ba. Do it with grace no. Di mo kailangan makipaglaban sa kanya or anything. Lalo na mukhang youre still hoping kayo in the end. Mahirap pag sumagot ka or mangatwiran ka now, kasi definitely kung plano mo kayo pa rin, may damage na relationship nyo ni MIL ( future ) di ba.. So wag mo na lang palalain yung situation. Walk out with dignity no. Di ka naman siguro ginapang ng magulang mo para lang apihin ng ibang tao

[midnight]

So what if she thinks na sumuko ka na? Is that how YOU will view your moving out? In the end, it's about how you feel, and how your bf will (hopefully) understand the situation. Nevermind what she thinks. Malamang, pag mag move out ka, mas lalo mapaaga ang paglipat ni bf din ng house. hehe. Eh di talo siya.

[aquacharly]

Does her opinion of you matter that much?  There are other things that should matter more.

Eh ano kung Isipin nya sumuko ka?
Aba Aba Aba, darling, ako man maka encounter ng rude aswang -- I will run, hindi na ko magiisip pang makidakdak.   There are lots of other stuff to make manindigan about, not a rude aswang. 

Please take more care of yourself, by making the right choices & worrying about what matters really.

[mocha1209]

mga sis thank you for all your replies. i really appreciate it. at least by posting here in gt i could get honest and helpful answers. 

Today medyo cold ako kay bf gusto ko kasi na magnilay kahit sandali about us. I realized na yes i love him pero i think it's time na isipin ko muna sarili ko. Hindi ko pa man nasasabi sa kanya ang plans ko to move out  I will eventually tell him after mag come up na ako ng money para maka move out. I cannot asks my parents to ask for money kasi they will ask me why. ayoko naman na sumama ang image ng family ni bf sa kanila. Sana lang mag work out pa rin ang relationship namin after this decision. Dati, i'm 100% sure na i want to be with him for the rest of my life. Pero ngayon i'm having doubts na. 

1. Panu pag magasawa na kami tuloy pa rin ang sustento niya sa family niya which i know could affect our own finances and worst pagawayan namin yan in the future. Hindi naman ako nagdadamot ang akin lang siguro naman enough na yung all this time tumutulong siya to the point na kahit wala na matira sa kanya.

2. Pakialamera ang mudra niya, i can feel na kahit nakabukod kami ng bahay eh wala magbabago.

3.  Ayoko dumating sa point na pag nagkatuluyan kami magaway kami dahil sa family niya and worst maghiwalay din in the end..

but behind all these things. deep inside mga sis gusto ko na "siya na talaga" pero what to do, di naman pwede makipag switch ng family. i still want to believe the saying na " eh ano naman kung di ka gusto ng pamilya ng mapapangasawa mo? hindi naman sila pakikisamahan mo.." 

[aquacharly]

but behind all these things. deep inside mga sis gusto ko na "siya na talaga" pero what to do, di naman pwede makipag switch ng family. i still want to believe the saying na " eh ano naman kung di ka gusto ng pamilya ng mapapangasawa mo? hindi naman sila pakikisamahan mo.."   

Of course you cannot fall out of love with your bf in a heartbeat.
You may not even fall out of love, ever; inspite of the cargo family &  mommy dearest's demands on her slave, este son.

IF I were in your shoes, but who am I to know better...
I will not also close my eyes to what else the Universe out there has to offer.
Hindi ko insist na oo eto na nga lang The One & Only.  Malay ko?
Only Time can tell di ba.  So,  sige  just go with the flow.
But do not close yourself to possibilities. 

I will tell you something about that last quotation of yours.
That works only if you have loads of money (more than they have) so na kaya ng pera mo to silence them, to make them swallow whatever remarks against you is on their tongues.
That is how the world generally works, dear -- you get respect, you get consideration when you have money.  With this cargo family, IMO (but who am I to know really) --  based sa cuento mo, IMO --  Money talks, and it talks loud.

[shineadet]

i totally agree!!! 

[chicafabulosa]

Sis just listen to Aquarcharly. She's right. Youre still young and dont rush things. Right now, i salute you for at least trying to cover up his family but dont you think your family also have the right to know what's going on with you? Mahirap na pag mag asawa ma kayo super obligado pa rin sya to provide for your family. His mom sees you as a threat to her monthly allowance and honestly no matter what you do, she will never be nice to you.

If I were you MAG ARAL KA NA LANG MUNA... after you graduate there are a lot of guys na may "BALLS" that you can meet. It would be difficult if you continue what you're doing now. There's a bright future ahead of you and unahin mo muna sarili mo... Learn to love yourself more sis. It may sound selfish but it will help you a lot. Most of the time, we get the love we deserve by how we treat ourselves. Honestly, wag mo ipagpilitan sarili mo sa house just simply because you don't have the money yet to pay the rent... Be honest with your parents, they will be mad you of course that's the normal reaction of every parents but hindi ka rin nila matitiis lalo na pag nalaman nila how your hilaw na biyenan treats you...

In the end ikaw lang rin makakatulong sa sarili mo. And one thing don't let your bf choose between you and his mom especially if you're not ready with the result. JUST THINK OF YOURSELF FIRST before others. Goodluck

[mocha1209]

@ sis chicafabulosa and @ sis aquacharly thank you mga sis. I will definitely follow your advices. starting from today uunahin ko muna sarili ko before others. I will move out SOON na. Hahanap lang ako ng tiyempo. Thanks sa lahat i was able to gain confidence with myself na. I know he's no the only man in this world. Siguro focus muna ko sa studies para matapos ko na rin masterals ko. thanks mga sis. super appreciate lahat ng mga advices niyo.  (tears of joy) 

[chicafabulosa]

Basta unahin mo sarili mo... Di pa kayo kasal para magpa api ka ng ganyan. And kung ano man ang mangyari sa relationship nyo, wag kang mada down.. Make it as your inspiration to succeed and to improve yourself.

[mocha1209]

^ thank you sis! 

[Purple_Power]

Seems like you will be having future monster in law  hirap nga yan!

Only son ba ang bf mo? Yan talaga ang usual na problema if you are living with in-laws. Usually hindi ka talaga magiging komportable hanggang sa hindi ka talaga makakilos ng maayos kasi lahat ng galaw mo MALI agad.

Kaya nga ako I inform my bf already not to be with his mother kasi for sure I know the next thing will happen. Magiging utang na loob mo pa na andun ka. 

Observation ko lang rin. Yan ang problema kapag may mga malaking pagkukulang o ginawang kalokohan sa anak nila. Aabot sa point na kapag oras na niya para magkaroon ng sariling pamilya dyan mag-iinarte like selos selosan pero grabe kung tratuhin noon parang inis na inis sa pagkakaroon ng anak.