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Author Topic: filipino-chinese relationships  (Read 121731 times)

charlottemarie

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #220 on: October 02, 2008, 07:16:10 PM »
^ dapat if di nila kayang ipaglaban, wag nang simulan, masnakakasakit pa sila kasi kung ganun.

lesters_gal

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #221 on: October 02, 2008, 07:33:33 PM »
^exactly.whats the point having a relationship kung in the end wala rin pala mangyayari.its a waste of time,effort and most of all the love that your investing for the relationship.
~dOnT hAtE mE bEcAusE im bEaUtifuL~

rechelle

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #222 on: October 05, 2008, 05:46:19 AM »
hello po mga sis share ko lang rin yung sakin sobra [textspeak!] akong naka-relate sa mga kwen2 at usapan nyo. :)

hindi ko [textspeak!] naging bf. MU lang kami.

well tnx narin sa bestfriend ko na bading kaya kami nagkakilala ni M*** L**. he is working as a staff ni tsekwa. luv n luv ni best 2ng c guy na tsekwa kasama nya [textspeak!] 2 sa office at boss nya. nung mga [textspeak!] na yun nasa abroad q. pero e2ng si ate kong bading kwen2 ng kwen2 about me lalong-lalo na sa boss nya. [textspeak!] boss nya naman nakikinig sa mga pinag kwen2 ni ate bout sakin. infareness namn kay ate puro magaganda [textspeak!] mga kwen2 nya bout me. at parang na curious 2loy sakin si tsekwa. lalo na nung nalaman nya na malapit na kong uwi ng pinas hay naku kulang nalang malaman ng buong pinas na parating ako. at wala naman ko kamalay2 na kwinikwen2 pala ko ni ate kahit kanino. luv na luv [textspeak!] q ni best kaya proud [textspeak!] sakin. hehe  :)

hay naku lam nyo ba pagdating ko palang sa pinas at sa una naming pagkikita ni ate kong bading (ate [textspeak!] call namin sa isat-isa) wala na xang bukhang bibig kundi [textspeak!] boss nya. halos araw2 nalang ginawa ng diyos na magkasama kami ay i-kwen2 nya c boss. na masungit,mabait,topak,na feeling nya [textspeak!] si Andy @ si boss ay si Arthur ng coffee prince at marami pang iba. hangang humantong na nga na [textspeak!] ni ate na makita q si boss para raw makilatis ko @ kung ano nga ba masasabi ko. niyaya q ni ate sa swimming nila kasama [textspeak!] mga ka-officemate nila. may pasabi pa si ate na okay lang raw at payag si boss na isama ko. kaya lang hindi ako sumama nun kasi nahihiya ako. hay naku si ate ko super sama ng loob sakin dat [textspeak!]. humantong pa nga sa hindi nya ko pinapansin tapos 1day kinausap ako ni ate na babatiin nya lang raw ako pag sumama ko sakanya sa medical mission nila. ayun wala na akong nagawa kung hindi sumama. grabe ginising pa q @ inantay pa talaga q ni ate para sure ako na sasama sa kanya. nung [textspeak!] na un para talagang may powers o magnet na kailangan na magkita kaming 2 at magkakilala ni tsekwa. napansin ko lang! ang weird no!
lam nyo ba mga sis nung first ko sya nakita [textspeak!] na attract ako sa kanya [textspeak!] cute [textspeak!]. saka pasuplado effect @ mukhang tahimik na babaero pero pinigilan ko sarili ko nun [textspeak!] nga baka magkagalit kami ni ate dahil lang sa kanya. hay naku [textspeak!] namng si tsekwa pa-pampam na. kaya mega iwas ko nun sya namn dikit na ng dikit.@ ayun nahalata ni ate. nagalit sakin. nagsabi pa nga ako sa best ko nun [textspeak!] na un e.( grabe ate ang bilis ko umitim [textspeak!] sa pinas) sabay react na okay lang yan [textspeak!] yan yung mga [textspeak!] ni M***! hay teka lang selos si bakla kasi nga pansin nya na rin na type nga ako ni tsekwa. kaya ayun iniwasan ko na [textspeak!] at natapos [textspeak!] araw na yun ng hangang tinginan lang at konting chika ni tsekwa. pero sa sandaling araw na yun sobrang memorable sakin [textspeak!] alam ko sa sarili ko na na-love at 1st sight q sa kanya e. emagine ilang weeks kami hindi nagkita after med. mission pero parang habang buhay ko na hindi makakalimutan itsura nya @ mga pangyayari nung [textspeak!] na 1st met namin. regarding kay ate ko interesado raw sakin si tsekwa @ ask na ng ask bout sakin. nakapag magkausap kami sa phone ni ate use [textspeak!] office phone nila eh magkanda haba2 raw [textspeak!] leeg @ tenga nya para lang makinig sa mga sinasabi ni ate. @ ayun na nagsimula hindi [textspeak!] makuha ni tsekwa no. q [textspeak!] hindi binibigay ni ate ko. nag karoon lang [textspeak!] ng chance na makuha [textspeak!] no. q nung humingi ako ng favor sa kanila. dat [textspeak!] kailangan ako makausap ni ate para confirm na ok na nga [textspeak!] hinihingi ko na favor nagkataon pa na walng load sa cp nya si ate kaya ayun nakakuha [textspeak!] ng chance na ipagamit [textspeak!] phone ni tsekwa kay ate para call ako at malaman nya.. hay naku style nga naman ng mga guy! start na ng [textspeak!] na [textspeak!] sakin @ intertain ko namn [textspeak!] [textspeak!] nga luv ko nga at sobrang saya ko nun. hay naku pero xempre pa hard 2 get ako nun no. [textspeak!] nga hindi ko rin lam kung ano ba intensyon nya sakin mukha kasi [textspeak!] chikboy kaya ala ko tiwala. sabi ko pa nga na kaya ko lang sya intertain [textspeak!] boss [textspeak!] ni ate ko. @  nasaktan yata sa sinabi ko.kaya kunsensya ko [textspeak!] sabi nya malinis namn raw [textspeak!] intensyon nya sakin. na feel ko namn na totoo [textspeak!] [textspeak!] nya kaya ayun 2loy-2loy na ang mga pangyayari hanggang makwen2 ko lahat2 saknya ang lyf ko @ pati mga prob ko.wala [textspeak!] akong masabihan nun [textspeak!] nagwalaan na yung mga fren q.@ [textspeak!] best fren kong ate [textspeak!] sa panlalaki. sa pinakilala kong guy sa kanya. at ayun na nagyaya [textspeak!] na mag meet kami. @ 1st na meet namin hay naku grabe hindi na namin maramdaman [textspeak!] feelings namin nandun [textspeak!] nag holding hands na kmi @ nag kiss. oh dba ang bilis pero grabe heaven na talaga yung feelings ko nun @ 1st [textspeak!] ko lang nagawa sa talambuhay ko na sa unang pagkikita palang ay bumigay na ako ng ganun @ makipag kiss @ holding hands sa hindi ko namn bf. kaloka no. dat [textspeak!] nag ask [textspeak!] sakin kung ano raw ba kami at kung ano [textspeak!] [textspeak!] ko mangyari. ako 2ng si ga** sabi ko ayaw ko ng commitment o relasyon. ok na 2 MU lang pampalipas oras lang. [textspeak!] nga dat [textspeak!] ayaw q talagang magkaroon ng relasyon @ maydahilan ako kung bakit ayaw ko na ayun na nga ask nya kung bakit. nalaman nya kung ano reaon ko kung bakit ayaw ko ng relasyon @ yun namn pumayag [textspeak!] na ok lang sa kanya na MU kami [textspeak!] pa nagsabi na MU kami. madaya [textspeak!] [textspeak!] hindi nya sinabi sakin kung bakit sya pumayag @ [textspeak!] nya lang ng MU rin na relasyon. hangang humantong na sa madalas kami mag ka [textspeak!] @ nagkikita kami tinu2lungan nya ko sa mga prob ko kasama na [textspeak!] pinapasaya nya ko dahil pinararamdam nya sakin na nanjan lang [textspeak!] sa tabi ko sa madaling salita sya [textspeak!] naging night and shiny armor ko nung mga [textspeak!] na down q. at ayun lalo na q na-inlove sa kaya. kaya lang nung mga [textspeak!] na feel na nya na luv na luv q na [textspeak!] @ [textspeak!] q na ng maayos na relasyon hindi na [textspeak!] pumayag. sahindi ko alam na dahilan @ ayaw nya sabihin sakin. pero pinipilit ko talagang isak2 sa utak ko na hindi kami pwedeng mag sama [textspeak!] nga pinay ako tsekwa [textspeak!], mayaman [textspeak!] pobre lang ako. prominenteng ankan @ kami mababang uring tao sa antas ng lipunan. @ hindi ako naka grad ng college samantalang [textspeak!] eh sabigating skul nag aral. cute [textspeak!] ako hehe hay naku parang langit [textspeak!] lupa ako ganun ka complicated ang buhay namin. kya naman pagaalis kami ay pinag tatalunan pa namn [textspeak!] nahihiya akong umalis ng walang pera @ [textspeak!] nalang parati ang sumasagot. swempre ayoko namng isipin nya na pineperahan ko [textspeak!] kaya sa pagbabayad ng bill na gastos namin pag aalis kami. talagang pinipilit ko na hati kami. na ayun namn ang ayaw na ayaw nyang ginagawa. hay naku mahirap talagang pagsamahin ang tubig @ langis may kanya2ng pride. kaasar kung kailan mahal ko [textspeak!] 1 tao dun pa parati akong palpak sa lahat. kaya ayun hindi talaga kami compatible. @ kahit na hindi nya sinabi sakin [textspeak!] reason eh parang nasagot narin ng isip ko @ naka2long [textspeak!] mga post nyo mga sis. ako hangang ngayon may hang-over parin sa kanya [textspeak!] pinaglaban ko feelings ko sa kanya na kahit na ano man ang mangyari magmukha man akong t**** eh nagpakatotoo ako @ pinaramdam ko sa kanya ang pagmamahal ko kaya namn ngayon kahit malayo na ako @ nasa abroad ako [textspeak!] parin [textspeak!] inspirasyon ko @ balang araw may maipagmamalaki rin ako sa kanya. kahit pa ilang beses nya saking sabihin na hindi pwede @ ipagtulakan nya nalang ko sa iba. wala ko magawa luv ko talaga [textspeak!] @ hangang ngayon kahit na hindi kami ka2lad na ng dati. ay may paramdam parin [textspeak!] at sa tuwing magpaparamdam [textspeak!] eh run sa araw na fed-up na ko. kaya 2loy ako hangang ngayon umaasa parin @ nag-iisip na bakit kailangan pa magkakilala kami. sa kabila ng maraming hadlang at tahimik ang life ko nun at ngayon na focus na sa mundo ng tsekwa na 2. hay sad story :(

lesters_gal

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #223 on: October 05, 2008, 07:59:53 AM »
^sis edit mo.puro textspeak.hirap basahin.
~dOnT hAtE mE bEcAusE im bEaUtifuL~

charlottemarie

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #224 on: October 05, 2008, 10:11:06 AM »
^^ sis kakaduling post mo  :P

Keaki

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #225 on: October 05, 2008, 01:42:04 PM »
sis keaki i feel for you.ganyan din yung nangyari samin ng ex ko.kaya lang he's korean naman.same reason din kung bakit nag give up na sya.aside dun sa stress nya sa school and yung mga petty fights namin.we broke up lang last saturday,i wanted our relationship to work kaya lang parang pagod na rin sya and feeling nya in the end mag hihiwalay din kami...mas lalong masakit lang daw pag nangyari yun.kainis kasi parang wala syang faith sa love namin and kay GOD...hayy.life is not fair...sad... :(

sige sis iyak mo lang yan.masakit talaga.lalo na pag alam mo na you have so much love to give for that person kaya lang parang balewala lang sa kanila and wala sila paki alam kung nasasaktan ba nila tayo sa decision na ginawa nila.kasi for me yung mga ganyang tao napaka selfish ng dating eh.

Siguro kasi dahil first din niya, sabi sa akin ng mga friends ko na takot din daw siya. Nag-usap kami recently, and sabi niya wala na daw talaga siyang feelings. Nawala na lang daw bigla. Sakit talaga. But I thought that if I really love the guy like I say I do, I'll just let him go. It takes two people to start a relationship and make it work, and if our relationship isn't the one that he wants, I can't really do anything about it (kahit super hirap, grabe! hehe..). Oh, and we had a lot of petty fights din pala, pero we would talk it over and we'd apologize to each other kahit na hindi kami entirely may fault. Lesson learned for me din.

Hey sis I know how you feel! Hehe.. since I still have so much love to give to him, I'll just try to be the best person I can be to him given the situation. Isipin mo na lang na siguro he did it for the best, whatever that "best" is, and that don't hate him for it na lang. Hindi ko alam if gaano katagal kang hurting, but if it's any comfort to you, you're not alone in this.  :)
Loving someone who used to love you is most painful. I wish it were me all over again.

Keaki

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #226 on: October 05, 2008, 01:46:19 PM »
Rechelle... hehe! M.L din yung initials nung guy ko. M.L.L kasama surname, hehe! Pa-edit yung story mo, puro text speak. di ko mabasa ng maayos, hehe. ??? :(
Loving someone who used to love you is most painful. I wish it were me all over again.

rechelle

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #227 on: October 05, 2008, 03:19:29 PM »
sorry po minadali ko po [textspeak!] yung post ko ng letter eh..

eto na po edit ko na siya.. hehe

hello po mga sis share ko lang rin yung sakin sobra kasi akong naka-relate sa mga story at usapan nyo.

hindi ko siya naging bf. MU lang kami.

Well tnx narin sa bestfriend ko na bading kaya kami nagkakilala ni M*** L**. he is working as a staff ni tsekwa. love n love ni best itong c guy na tsekwa kasama nya kasi to sa office at boss nya. nung mga [textspeak!] na yun nasa abroad q. pero etong si ate kong bading kwento ng kwento about me lalong-lalo na sa boss nya. [textspeak!] boss niya naman nakikinig sa mga pinag kwento ni ate bout sakin. infareness naman kay ate puro magaganda yung mga kwento niya about me. at parang na curious tuloy sakin si tsekwa. lalo na nung nalaman nya na malapit na kong uwi ng pinas hay naku kulang nalang malaman ng buong pinas na parating ako. at wala naman ko kamalay-malay na kwinikwen2 pala ko ni ate kahit kanino. luv na luv [textspeak!] ko ni best kaya proud [textspeak!] sakin. hehe

hay naku lam niyo ba pagdating ko palang sa pinas at sa una naming pagkikita ni ate kong bading (ate [textspeak!] call namin sa isat-isa) wala na xang bukhang bibig kundi [textspeak!] boss nya. halos araw-araw nalang ginawa ng diyos na magkasama kami ay i-kwento nya c boss. na masungit,mabait,topak,na feeling nya [textspeak!] si Andy @ si boss ay si Arthur ng coffee prince at marami pang iba. hangang humantong na nga na gusto ni ate na makita q si boss para raw makilatis ko @ kung ano nga ba masasabi ko. niyaya q ni ate sa swimming nila kasama [textspeak!] mga ka-officemate nila. may pasabi pa si ate na okay lang raw at payag si boss na isama ko. kaya lang hindi ako sumama nun kasi nahihiya ako. hay naku si ate ko super sama ng loob sakin that time. humantong pa nga sa hindi niya ko pinapansin tapos 1 day kinausap ako ni ate na babatiin nya lang raw ako pag sumama ko sakanya sa medical mission nila. ayun wala na akong nagawa kung hindi sumama. grabe ginising pa ko @ inantay pa talaga ko ni ate para sure ako na sasama sa kanya. nung time na yun para talagang may powers o magnet na kailangan na magkita kaming 2 at magkakilala ni tsekwa. napansin ko lang! ang weird no!
lam nyo ba mga sis nung first ko sya nakita totoo na attract ako sa kanya kasi cute sya. saka pasuplado effect @ mukhang tahimik na babaero pero pinigilan ko sarili ko nun kasi nga baka magkagalit kami ni ate dahil lang sa kanya. hay naku eto namang si tsekwa pa-pampam na. kaya mega iwas ko nun sya naman dikit na ng dikit.@ ayun nahalata ni ate. nagalit sakin. Naalala ko pa nga nagsabi ako sa best ko nun [textspeak!] na un e.( grabe ate ang bilis ko umitim [textspeak!] sa pinas) sabay react na okay lang yan kasi yan yung mga [textspeak!] ni M***! hay teka lang selos si bakla kasi nga pansin nya na rin na type nga ako ni tsekwa. kaya ayun iniwasan ko na sya at natapos yung araw na yun na hangang tinginan lang at konting chika ni tsekwa. pero sa sandaling araw na yun sobrang memorable sakin kasi alam ko sa sarili ko na na-love at first sight ko sa kanya. imagine ilang weeks kami hindi nagkita after med. mission pero parang habang buhay ko na hindi makakalimutan itsura nya @ mga pangyayari nung time na first met namin. regarding kay ate ko interesado raw sakin si tsekwa @ ask na ng ask bout sakin. nakapag magkausap kami sa phone ni ate use [textspeak!] office phone nila eh magkanda haba-haba raw yung leeg @ tenga niya para lang makinig sa mga sinasabi ni ate sa usapan namin. @ ayun na nagsimula hindi [textspeak!] makuha ni tsekwa no. ko kasi ayaw at hindi binibigay ni ate ko. nag karoon lang [textspeak!] ng chance na makuha [textspeak!] no. ko nung humingi ako ng favor sa kanila. dat [textspeak!] kailangan ako makausap ni ate para confirm na ok na nga yung hinihingi ko na favor nagkataon pa na walng load sa cp niya si ate kaya ayun nakakuha [textspeak!] ng chance na ipagamit [textspeak!] phone ni tsekwa kay ate para call ako at malaman nya.. hay naku style nga naman ng mga guy! start na ng pag [textspeak!]-[textspeak!] niya sakin @ intertain ko naman siya kasi nga love ko nga at sobrang saya ko nun at kilig. hay naku pero syempre pa hard to get ako nun no. kasi nga hindi ko rin lam kung ano ba intensyon nya sakin mukha kasi siya chikboy kaya wala ko tiwala. sabi ko pa nga na kaya ko lang siya intertain kasi boss siya ni ate ko. @  nasaktan yata sa sinabi ko.kaya naman nakunsensya ko. pero sabi niya malinis naman raw yung intensyon nya sakin. na feel ko naman na totoo yung sinabi nya kaya ayun tuloy-tuloy na ang mga pangyayari hanggang makwento ko lahat-lahat sa kanya ang story ng life ko @ pati mga prob ko.wala akong inilihim sa kanya halos laht kwento ko.wala kasi akong masabihan nun kasi nagwalaan na yung mga fren q may mga kanya-kanya ng buhay.@ yung best friend kong ate busy sa panlalaki. sa pinakilala kong guy sa kanya. at ayun na nagyaya siya na mag meet kami. @ 1st na meet namin hay naku grabe hindi na namin mapigilan na maiparamdam yung feelings namin nandun yung nag holding hands na kami @ nag kiss agad. oh diba ang bilis pero grabe heaven na talaga yung feelings ko nun @ 1st time ko lang nagawa sa talambuhay ko na sa unang pagkikita palang ay bumigay na ako ng ganun @ makipag kiss @ holding hands sa hindi ko namn bf. kaloka no. that time nag ask din siya sakin kung ano raw ba kami at kung ano [textspeak!] [textspeak!] ko mangyari. ako itong si ga** sabi ko ayaw ko ng commitment o relasyon. ok na 2 MU lang pampalipas oras lang. [textspeak!] nga that time ayaw ko talagang magkaroon ng relasyon @ may malalim na dahilan ako kung bakit ayaw ko pa ng relasyon. na ayun na nga ask niya kung bakit. nalaman niya kung ano reason ko kung bakit ayaw ko ng relasyon @ ayun naman pumayag si g**o at mukhang favor sa kanya.  na ok lang sa kanya na MU na nga lang kami. madaya siya kasi hindi nya sinabi sakin kung ano yung reason niya at pumayag rin siya sa ganung setup na MU na relasyon. hangang humantong na sa madalas kami mag ka [textspeak!] @ nagkikita kami tinutulungan niya ko sa mga problem ko kasama na yung pinapasaya nya ko dahil pinararamdam niya sakin na nandyan lang siya sa tabi ko sa madaling salita siya yung naging night and shiny armor ko nung mga time na down q. at ayun lalo na ko na-inlove sa kaya. kaya lang nung mga time na feel na niya na love na love ko na siya @ gusto ko na ng maayos na relasyon hindi na siya pumayag. Sa hindi ko alam na dahilan @ ayaw niya sabihin sakin. pero pinipilit ko talagang isak-sak sa utak ko na hindi kami pwedeng mag sama [textspeak!] nga pinay ako tsekwa siya, mayaman siya pobre lang ako. prominenteng angkan @ kami mababang uring tao sa antas ng lipunan. @ hindi ako naka grad ng college samantalang siya eh sa bigating school nag aral. cute siya ako chaka, maputi siya ako morena, singkit mata niya ako hehe hay naku parang langit siya lupa ako ganun ka complicated ang buhay namin. kaya naman pagaalis kami ay pinag tatalunan pa namin kasi nahihiya akong umalis ng walang pera @ siya nalang parati ang sumasagot. swempre ayoko namang isipin niya na pineperahan ko siya kaya sa pagbabayad ng bill na nagastos namin pag umaalis kami. talagang pinipilit ko na hati kami. na ayun naman pala ang ayaw na ayaw nyang ginagawa. hay naku mahirap talagang pagsamahin ang tubig @ langis may kanya-kanyang pride. kaasar kung kailan mahal ko ang isang tao dun pa parati akong palpak sa lahat. kaya ayun hindi talaga kami compatible. @ kahit na hindi nya sinabi sakin yung reason eh parang nasagot narin ng isip ko @ nakatulong yung mga post nyo mga sis. ako hangang ngayon may hang-over parin sa kanya [textspeak!] pinaglaban ko feelings ko sa kanya na kahit na ano man ang mangyari magmukha man akong t**** eh nagpakatotoo ako @ pinaramdam ko sa kanya ang pagmamahal ko kaya naman ngayon kahit malayo na ako @ nasa abroad ako siya parin yung inspirasyon ko @ balang araw may maipagmamalaki rin ako sa kanya. kahit pa ilang beses nya saking sabihin na hindi pwede @ ipagtulakan nya ko sa iba. wala ko magawa love ko talaga siya @ hangang ngayon kahit na hindi kami katulad na ng dati. ay may paramdam parin siya at sa tuwing magpaparamdam siya eh dun sa araw na fed-up na ko at ititigil ko na ang mga kagagahan ko sa kanya. kaya 2loy ako hangang ngayon umaasa parin @ nag-iisip na bakit kailangan pa magkakilala kami at nararamdaman ko parin na may pagasa pa . sa kabila ng maraming hadlang at tahimik ang life ko nun at ngayon na focus na sa mundo ng tsekwa na 2. hay sad story

Keaki

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #228 on: October 05, 2008, 04:23:12 PM »
Rechelle!

Hey.. grabe naman yung story mo. In a way medyo parehas yung situation natin. Alam mo, ang lungkot ng nangyari sayo, pero siguro ang big contributor there was that naging masyadong mabilis yung pagiging m.u niyo. Dapat inalam mo muna yung reason na ayaw niya sabihin sayo. Based on experience, ang hirap kasi talaga super na hinuhulaan mo lang lahat.

Dun sa umaasa ka pa, well ako rin, actually, medyo umaasa pa rin, but think of it this way: do you want to be with someone who can't fight for you, or who can't give you the love and appreciation you deserve? Baka yung reason na ayaw niya sabihin sayo has something to do with you, pero ayaw lang niya sabihin to avoid hurting feelings. Di natin alam. Pero okay lang yan. If he doesn't want a serious relationship, either he's afraid of that kind of risk, or it's just not the relationship he wants for life. Either way, dapat mag-move-on ka na. There are other things in life to be happy about (yan yung na-re-realize ko ngayon). Sana things will be better for you. Kaya mo yan  ;D Yung experience natin would hopefully help us become stronger and wiser people pagdating sa mga relationship.  :-*

Loving someone who used to love you is most painful. I wish it were me all over again.

angelN0more

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #229 on: October 05, 2008, 05:29:40 PM »
i have my story to share. i am a 100% chinese girl who fell in love with a filipino guy.  I didnt plan to and I tried not to. We just had this chemistry that made us close.   I never lied to him, he was well aware of the fact that my parents/family would never approve or maybe have a hard time accepting things.  I was reserved at first, but he was able to convince me that he love me and he would stay with me whatever will happen.

We were okay for around 4 years.  He made me happy and feel special, something i never felt before.  We hardly fought, even close to never, I cant remember any instance we did. It was everything i wanted in a relationship, but i kept from my family, I wanted to be sure I will be able to fight for him, to make all the love and understanding he gave me worth it. 

He met another girl, someone who was aware of our sitation, but still chose to take our differences as an opportunity.  He started to like her.  I gave way, it was so painful.  I never asked him to come back, the most i did was to ask him why it happened.  All he said was, the heart wants what it wants... that phrase alone, i will never forget.  it's his way of telling me, i dont love u anymore.

It was hard, and painful, no matter how sad or how lonely or how much i wanted to cry, i have to hold back tears at home. I release all my frustrations when i am not at home... I cry on the plane, on the mrt, bus, in the office.  I know i was a pitiful site bec people at work started telling me to go home, or take a vacation.  Home is not where i wanted to be.  I find it harder to pretend i am ok. I thought nothing can hurt me more, until he started calling me, crying... he doesnt want to tell me the reason, but i know someone is making him unhappy.  It went on like this for some time, I have to put away my hurt, to make sure he was ok.  We never really talk about things, i'll just go thru the torture of hearing him hurt, then he will be ok again -- they will be ok again.

Months passed, and he decided to come back.  I still love him, and i took him back, no questions asked. I never knew what happened to them bec he doesnt want to talk about things, all i know was he is back.  with all my foolishness, i finally told my family about him, thinking he would realize that i am serious about working things out and that i really loved him. i took every painful thing hurled against me.  i expected it, i made the decision, i chose this path.  i knew they will never understand.  people asked me if it's worth it, i never knew, i just hope it would be worth it.  i thought it will be like what he promised, he will always be there for me, he'll never leave.  we were happy for a while, but i saw how he has changed.  he lost patience, and he doesnt care much anymore. if i am sad or depressed, he tells me it's my own doing, i should be more positive and i should move on. he didnt even bother to see how much i am giving up for him. several nights i will wait for him to get home safely, little did i know, he was making sure someone else gets home safely.

The happy ending always evade me.  I found out he was still constantly seeing her.  I asked him why again... i got no answer. he didnt know as well.  I gave up everything, my family, for nothing.... for something he didnt know. as the tears fall, he's with her again right now.  it's her bday and it is his grand responsibility to be there being a responsible man.

i am alone now.  I am so crushed that i dont even feel anything anymore. I dont know where to go, I dont know what to pursue.  Any plans i had need to change again.  I dont know what i want, I dont know where i want to be. The future is a blank wall for me. I dont want to even go home.  I was warned about this when i said i will fight for him.  My mom said, never to come back crying when he leaves me.  The family is not very forgiving, seeing me crying and hurt now would justify their views more.  I did not listen, I followed my heart.  this is the outcome... i have to live with.

No one knows the turmoil inside me. I laugh and smile when i wanted to cry.  I still cry in public, I cry before i sleep, I cry in the shower, I cry when people starts showing they care for me.  some peoply might think that i am wallowing in self pity, but i am just hurting.  I am scared and I am scarred.  something, somewhere died inside of me, but i need to be strong.  I made the decision, I suffer the consequences.  Some people just cant handle the consequences that's why they leave. you really cant blame them, bec losing the family, and eventually losing the one u love is not easy. It's hard to be alone.

pampolinous

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #230 on: October 05, 2008, 08:28:18 PM »
^sis, i feel for you. but i also think you are a strong and logical person. the fact that you can write out your mistakes is a sign that you still have your consciousness.

what's your plan now? are you still planning on staying on with him or to go home?

Keaki

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #231 on: October 05, 2008, 08:50:49 PM »
^ Yeah, I agree! Even if your family is not-too-forgiving, in time they will always find it their hearts to take you back (if you do choose to go home!). But your bad experience shouldn't let you affect the way you view Filipinos, in general. What he did was really despicable, and I don't know how a person can just throw that kind of love and dedication away. I don't really know a lot of people who fight for their forbidden relationship, and so I admire you for taking that step. It's too bad that right now it isn't working out, but I think you're a lot stronger than you credit yourself to be, and, in time, if it still won't work out no matter how hard you try (and you say he's really changed), then maybe it's time you let the hurt go and make something even more wonderful out of yourself. If you do choose to move on, for the huge amount of love you have in you, you deserve to be loved and treated better. It's hard to be alone, but it's harder living with someone who cannot appreciate you for the person that you are, and for all the efforts, love, and appreciation that you give him.

Don't try to force to keep all the hurt in. Just let it all out. Things are hard, but they have a way of getting better. Don't forget to pray. Praying and letting all the hurt out are really comforting. If you still question if it was worth it, simply think that this is just a trial you have to overcome (and eventually will) to become a stronger and better person, and that you are never given a situation that you can't handle. Things will be better for you, and when they do, you'll be thankful that you were brave enough to overcome this. There are always other things in life to be happy about, and that things are always clearer after the storm.

Losing the one you love really is very hard, but just be strong and do what you think is right. After that, just hold on. Everything will eventually get better.  :-*

*Random suggestion, but I read somewhere that loneliness (especially after a break up) can somewhat be lessened by buying a pet and pouring out all your love and maternal instincts on it.*
« Last Edit: October 05, 2008, 09:11:58 PM by Keaki »
Loving someone who used to love you is most painful. I wish it were me all over again.

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #232 on: October 06, 2008, 03:25:51 AM »
angelN0more: hi, gurl.. i am so moved by your story. maybe you don't deserve him at all. you deserve someone better. you've done your part and he blew his second chance. you are so forgiving that you accepted him after that first time he went with someone else. if i was in your case, a third party is enough reason for me to leave him behind and start anew. you must really be in love with him. but as what others say, you should learn to love yourself first before loving another person.

or maybe you might want to make him feel your absence. in your absence, let him weigh things and decide for what he or who he really wants to be with. it may work in favor or against you, but be prepared. maybe it's also the time for you to build other relationships, like new friendship or perhaps rebuild your relationship with your family. your world shouldn't just revolve around him. what i want to say is, get a life, gurl!

to the other guys and gurls who have problems with their inter-racial relationships:
it is always you who will decide for your future. you are always given a choice. decide for what you think will make you happy. if it fails, atleast you won't be wondering what could have been.
I dOn't hAvE an ATTITUDE PROBLEM. YoU hAvE a PERCEPTION PROBLEM..



God may have created the man before the WOMAN... But there IS always A rough-draft before the MASTERPIECE... Don't you agree?

rechelle

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #233 on: October 06, 2008, 04:38:37 AM »
salamat po keaki.. :)

hay naku sana nga maka move-on na ako. :( hirap rin kasi sa edad kong 24 first time ko palang ma-inlove ng ganito sablay pa! hehe.. lam u sis meron sakin mga nanliligaw ngayon. wala talaga ko ma-feel sa kanila na something na kagaya ng na feel ko sa kanya. alam ko kasi na love na eto hindi infatuation lang. ngayon alam ko na ang ibig sabihin talaga ng love at matured na ko ngayon kapag usaping pag-ibig na ang pinaguusapan. hay matanda na ako. marami akong natutuhan, nagawa, nagpakatotoo ko sa kanya at sa sarili ko, lahat ng nararamdaman ko naparamdam ko at nasabi ko. na talagang naging masaya ako at ngayon nasasaktan ako ng sobra.. weird no? kasi ugali ko dati marami akong limitations sa buhay at sa sarili ko. puro what if?, hindi pwede ito bawal!!, dapat ganito lang! kino-kontrol ko ba yung sarili ko. minsan nga kahit gusto ko na tumatangi pa ako. grabe daig ko pa si best na bading masmagulo utak ko sa kanya. kaya eto sa sobrang pagpipigil ko sa sarili nabuhos ko na lahat sa tsekwa na ito. aba-aba napaka swerte niya ha.. ???
lahat sila na nanliligaw sa akin intertain ko. baka nga kasi makatulong sila para makalimutan ko siya kaya lang wala talaga kong maramdaman sa kanila. lam u ba sis wala rin tulak-kabigin sa kanila kasi lahat sila may mapagmamalaki rin, maganda ang mga trabaho nila, pwede rin silang pang display at mga yummy rin cla ha.. ;D (dito lahat sila ngayon sa abroad) kaya lang minsan lang yata talaga tumibok ang puso ko at mahirap siya diktahan hehe.. ayun lahat sila dispatsya ko na kahapon lang! sabi nga sakin ng isang guy na nanliligaw sakin. malamang raw maging matanda akong dalaga. bastos! hehe.. ginagawa ko nga dito pinapagod ko na yung sarili ko sa work para bagsak na ako pagdating ng bahay.kaya lang bawat sandali at lalo na pagmatutulog na ako naiisip ko talaga sya.pero pilit ko nalang syang pinaglalabanan. hay naku kaya ko to!! sa  ngayon hindi pa yata talagang time para makipagrelasyon ako at ayaw pa ibigay ni God yung guy na para sakin.pinipili nya pa yung pinaka best hehe..faith nalang kay God ang tangi ko ngayong hehe wala ng kontra ha!! marami pa raw kasi umaasa sakin ngayon sabi ni hehe pray ko nalang lagi kay God na sana mawala na itong feelings ko kasi nahihirapan narin ako at masyado na talaga ko nasasaktan. at salamat na rin at nakilala ko siya. :D

rechelle

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #234 on: October 06, 2008, 04:51:32 AM »
keaki.. 3 words yung name nya at L saka Y [textspeak!] surname nya. ang haba no? nasanay nalang ko na M*** L** yung pagkakilala ko sa kanya.

oo girl kaya natin eto!!

aja aja ! ! !

tin5716

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #235 on: October 06, 2008, 09:48:17 AM »
angelN0more: i'm so sorry to hear that, but i admire your courage to stand up for what you are fighting for and stand up for what you believe in.

my story: im not a pure chinese but more than half.. the guy naman is pure filipino. i met the guy through gym because he was my personal trainer. i told him all about our tradition and rules. what my mom wants for me and what she doesn't want. at first i was hesitant that he wants to court me, but eventually i approved. in just a month of being my pt, parang i've known him for so long na. i felt very comfortable with him but i don't show it to him. at first kasi i was shocked with him telling me about how he felt. kasi i felt that it was too fast, he was telling me that he liked me na in and he is inlove with me. before becoming my p.t. he would say hi to me when we see each other and i would say hi back. he told me that he had a crush on me even before and he was just scared to approach me because of my old trainer and that he thought i was mataray.. haha=)
as months passed..i was kinda sure of what i felt for him. i was always waiting for his text messages in the morning and his calls. it was like i was longing for him. i hated it when he doesn't text sometimes because he doesn't have load daw.. kaya what i did when he didn't text i wouldn't text also, then when called me i wouldn't answer until he texted me if i was mad or something, this went on for 5 months or so.. i wanted to prove kasi that he really loves me and that he would do anything for me cause it's hard getting in a filipino-chinese relationship. i was able to prove naman that he really loves me. ones kasi he told me he would accompany me to the mall because i need my phone repaired, while we were texting, he told me that he might not be able to accompany me after all because of his boss which made me kinda mad and frustrated so after that i didn't text him until he went home and texted me. he asked me if i was mad at him, then i told him no even though it was kinda obvious because of the way i texted him, then the next morning i didn't reply and even answer his calls until he texted me that he was going to resign na because i was mad at him, so answered his texts and calls na after that and we got to talk.

after that incident we started seeing each other during weekends and we shared stories during weekdays after i went to the gym. this went on for a month.. until my mom saw my credit card bill. because i enrolled for another p.t.. but before she talked to me she asked my sister about that, i kinda hated my sister for that, because she told my mom that i was constantly talking to some guy on the phone. so my mom asked me who i was talking to everyday, i was caught what am i suppossed to do... she told me i told you many times that i didn't want a filipino guy for you... she didn't understand.. the next day she called me again and asked me to chose between the guy of them. she told me, if i chose the guy i should move out of the house immediately. i was so hurt, because it's not just that. she really said bad stuff about me. she said that she didn't trust me anymore, that she should have stopped at four children and never gave birth to me anymore.. thinking of that makes me cry everytime. she even called one of my brothers and my sister while she was talking to me. she didn't even want to know the guy. she told me that i can't go to that gym anymore. and that i should forget about him. it's so hard, because i really love him. my mom told me that the guy would only be after our money which isn't true. i told her that they have their own business, and told me why would he work at the gym if they have their own business, i told her that, that's what he wants to do. the guy is kinda well-off, his mom has her own business and his dad has his own to. the guy naman has his own convenience store. i told the guy about what my mom said, i told him i want to leave the house, but he said na i should follow whatever my mom tells me and that this is one of the many trials that we have to pass through. he told me that he would never leave me and will wait for me no matter how long it takes. he also told me that he would really work hard to become rich(he is very independent and doesn't want to rely on his parents) because he wants to show my mom that he would be worth for me.

*this is just a recent story. i can only go out if i am with my sister. until now i feel like im a prisoner at home. because i don't know if i can go out and my mom sometimes even checks my phone if i am still texting or calling him.. for 4 straight days i've been crying constantly thinking of the situation. btw i am 23 years old and the guy is 29. and its my first time to fall inlove like this. i can't help but cry when i think about our situation. i want to fight my love for him because i know that he will too. until now my mom and i aren't talking yet which also bothers me becuase we are really close. i hope that my mom would be enlightened, i hope that she would still change her mind.


« Last Edit: October 06, 2008, 08:09:08 PM by tin5716 »

1choi_ko9

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #236 on: October 06, 2008, 10:02:57 AM »
i used to be in this kind of relationship. Sort of, parang ganyan. First love ko sya, sandali lang naman kami. Pero ewan ko fall deeply bad ako sakanya, Im a filipino and he's chinese. Basta bigla na lang sya nawala ng parang bula ng pinakilala ko sa dad ko. nyeee...Although after ng pagkikilala, we still talked pero dalang nalang....grabe,,,masakit pala yun,.,,malay ko ba sa love love na yan eh. Pero nothing happened naman. Then my next bf (my husband now), is also chinese pero lahi na lang nasa 1/4 na lang hehe....wala sa itsura nya..pero yung mom nila mukha talaga chinese... =) so far soo good...were okay now with 2 kids =)

charlottemarie

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #237 on: October 06, 2008, 06:20:54 PM »
@sis angelnomore

sis i'm sure that your family would be happy if you turned to them for comfort. mga parents ganyan yan sa salita pero they can't stand to see their children hurt. :D

mabuti na rin yun na nalaman mo about your bf... walang kwenta pala eh.

angelN0more

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #238 on: October 07, 2008, 12:00:16 AM »
thanks for all the replies.

i dont think il go back anywhere for now. i've been thru it before, until now, my mom still constantly reminds me of my mistakes from almost a decade ago.  We're not close as well, she remembers more of my mistakes.  

for now, i want to go someplace far away, where no one knows me.  

i did something bad... i wrote something online, napahiya yung girl.  it feels bad because i didnt really mean to do it.  it was out of anger and frustration. i know i shouldnt have done it bec it doesnt make things any better.  he wouldnt love me more, in fact, it feels worst that he understands her more.  he still tells me he loves me, it's painful bec i dont know what it means anymore.  it feels empty to be loved, and yet you always have to compromise.    

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[textspeak!]-chi relationships doesnt always end bad, my friends got married a few weeks ago.  the [textspeak!] guy moved mountains for her.  despite having a long distance relationship, he did everything for her.  since they are working in different countries, he makes it a point to fetch her (fly into the country she's in) so that they can fly back to manila together.  they went on like this for a year, going home every 3 months. he was able to convince her parents finally agreed for them to get married.  

everyone who knows him admires what he was able to do.  it's been the topic here, how parents dont even give a single chance, but he was still able to prove himself worthy.  when u look at their pictures, the girl is really super chinita and white and the guy is super moreno and may punto pa magsalita.
i was crying when i watched the video he created for her at their wedding.  there's this line he used, "when others can only see our differences, all i see is how perfect we are for each other".

it makes me look forward to a happy ending... someday...

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Re: filipino-chinese relationships
« Reply #239 on: October 07, 2008, 01:11:15 AM »
^ glad we still have success stories in here. yeah let's not generalize. some filipino-chinese love story can succeed.

i wish you well. maybe you really need to relax and try to find yourself again. in GOD's time, you'll see find your own happy ending.
I dOn't hAvE an ATTITUDE PROBLEM. YoU hAvE a PERCEPTION PROBLEM..



God may have created the man before the WOMAN... But there IS always A rough-draft before the MASTERPIECE... Don't you agree?

 

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