Congresswoman Lucy Torres-Gomez and actor Richard Gomez have been together for 13 years and counting, but despite all the intrigues that have come their way, the two remain steadfast in their commitment to each other. Lucy is very vocal about how much she loves her husband, and it's not a secret that Richard adores her right back.
What advice does Lucy have to give for other married couples who want to strengthen their marriage? Read on to find out.
1. DON'T FORCE HIM TO BE SOMETHING HE'S NOT, AND ENCOURAGE HIM DO TO THE SAME WITH YOU.
"We don't impose our individual interests on each other," Lucy explains. "I don't bug Richard to go to dance class with me because I know he doesn't like it. In the same way, he doesn't pressure me to learn volleyball or baseball because he knows I won't enjoy it."
2. KEEP YOUR IDENTITIES, BUT HAVE ACTIVITIES YOU DO TOGETHER.
“I don’t have to be with him everywhere, like he doesn’t have to be with me all the time. I allow him to be his own person, and he allows me to find my joy, and we’re both happy that way. So when we get together at the end of the day, there’s so much to share with each other.” Things they do enjoy together are eating, watching movies, and traveling.
3. TALK TO EACH OTHER.
“It’s a regular thing between Richard and I before we go to bed at night. We talk about anything and everything, from the nonsensical to the deep. I’m so talkative, though, that sometimes he says that even when we’re sleeping, I’m still talking to him!”
4. BE HIS FRIEND.
Lucy stresses the importance of developing a friendship. “You can’t just be lovers. You can’t wake up and just want to be irritatingly cute to your husband all the time. You won’t be cute forever. You have to genuinely enjoy each other’s company.”
5. COMMIT EVERY DAY.
“Not a day goes by that we don’t say ‘I love you’ to each other. I’m really happy where I am. There’s so much about my husband to love, so maybe it’s easy for me to say there’s no plan B. Not making it work is just not an option.”
6. GIVE EACH OTHER SPACE.
Every relationship has its highs and lows. When you're having a misunderstanding, give each other time to reflect. “You just have to take the good with the bad. On off days, give each other space. It’s just a bad day.” Lucy believes there’s nothing a little lambing can’t fix.
7. LEARN FROM YOUR HUBBY.
Lucy is all praises for her man. “Richard has taught me how to be the best I can be. He’s very sturdy, very dependable, and you can really count on him. Richard is a very loving husband and father who has simple needs. He’s not a complicated man. He’s easy to love.”
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(First published in Women's Health Magazine as a sidebar to Denise San Jose's "Super Woman" in January-February 2011; photo courtesy of PEP.ph; adapted for use in Female Network)